Category Archives: Living Well

Two Steps to Tuning Your Mental Radio

A Woman tries to think with the mental radio playing behind her.

The alarm sounds and you reach to turn it off. As you lie there for a moment you stretch and become aware of a new day. What’s the first thought beyond, “Oh I want to lay here a little longer”? Somewhere during that last stretch your mental radio came on.

What is it playing? Is it the sound of quiet peace that drives you to look forward to the day, or sadness, anger or perhaps a conglomeration of worries or fears? As humans we are emotional beings. While all of these feelings are possible, not all are healthy.

Moving forward a little bit you’re standing in front of the mirror. When you look at yourself what do you see? What message does the mental radio play? If you don’t look at yourself, why not? If you do, what do you focus on? Do you see things that please you about yourself or areas that make you critical? Do you look yourself in the eye and mentally talk to yourself, or do you avoid eye contact altogether? If you do project thoughts to yourself, what are you hearing? Are you encouraging and motivating with words for a happy and successful day, or thoughts of being overweight, tired, lonely, and sad or limiting thoughts about your confidence and capabilities?

The sounds you hear come from the mental radio. This is the radio that you tune each day. You control the tuning dial.

Let’s move forward. You’re now in your vehicle and on your way to work. In your mind how do you respond to the drivers around you? Do you let them go on or do you feel a sense of frustration? How many times do you look at the clock during your commute? Do you feel rushed? As the miles narrow between your current location and work, are there physical changes in how you feel?

Think back to that last stretch when you awoke; compare your physical body from then to now. Has your breathing changed? Is there a new tightness in your chest or stomach? What is the mental radio playing? As you get closer to work do you hear happy songs or thoughts, or do you replay and rehearse work conversations or disagreements?

Once again, you’re hearing the radio that you control. As the radio dial goes to a lower frequency each time you turn it to the left, the sound of negative self-talk comes in clearer, the sounds that make you believe false stories thrown at you throughout life, the lie that you are not enough, that you are flawed in some way. These are the messages that you find yourself listening to and believing songs like, “I’m expecting a bad day today”. Those things that you focus on are the conditions that you attract.

This radio is yours. You control it. When you turn the dial to the right, the positive frequency increases and your level of optimism naturally and automatically grows. Instead of expecting conflict you look forward to time with good people and good opportunities. That mental radio you control starts playing songs like, “I am enough and I look forward to a new day of life.”

While you don’t have a dial on your forehead you can control your frequency, the thoughts that increase your confidence, that make you want to look yourself in the eye in the morning, knowing you are a force for positive change in the lives of those around you.

Those things that you focus on are the conditions that you attract.

I have the privilege of watching clients arrive with decades of trauma and abuses and then make incredible shifts toward confidence, excitement for life and a unique sense of inner peace. There are a variety of concepts and processes we do together beyond the scope of this article. The first is a truth that changes their mindset.

As they recognize this truth, they become aware of their current physical state. Simply stated it is this: “Every thought creates a chemical reaction within your body”. When you focus on the negative, your body reacts accordingly, increasing stress, labors breathing in the chest and causes stomach discomfort. (Remember the physical recognition during the morning commute?) When you become aware of this truth and recognize your existence, you can take a proactive step to adjust the dial of your life. When you focus on the positive, your mind and body calms.

As emotional, energetic beings we attract the types of people, opportunities and health conditions from the frequency of our thoughts. You control that mental radio and what it plays. You choose how you feel and you determine your abilities to expect and attain successful living.

Let’s step back and look at the day. We’ve looked at rising, standing before the mirror and driving to work. This is a small snippet of the day, maybe only two to three hours. Look at the variety of thoughts and feelings you’ve experienced in this short time. Each of these day-to-day activities and how your feel tell a lot about your life. In future articles, we’ll look closer at these.

Every thought creates a chemical reaction within your body.

For now, I challenge you starting tomorrow to examine your own life during these same time periods. Be honest with yourself and recognize three simple things:

  • What do you think and feel?
  • How do you treat yourself before the mirror?
  • What physical and thought changes occur during your commute?

Then package all this together. Is this the “You” that you wanted when you were young? Your life might be challenging… or it could be awesome. Regardless, we all have positive paths we can walk if we decide today to change the frequency of our lives.

So, how do you turn that dial to the right to increase the positive? Earlier we talked about recognizing your condition. Another powerful tool is acknowledging those good things currently in existence in your life today. Let’s look at simple things.

The alarm sounded and you woke up. You have another day of life. Look at your health. Even if challenged in some way, what physical resources do you have? Can you see, hear or talk? You have the gift of communication for this day. It’s an opportunity to speak kindness into someone’s life or just to be quiet and listen. And if you choose not to do that, that’s your fault because you tune your own dial to the negative. You bring kindness into your own life by being kind to others.

Do you live in a home? Do have food and fresh drinking water? There are millions in this world who do not. What skills do you have? Are you artistic? What good people do you know? Each of these touch in some way the things to be grateful for. Gratefulness is a natural positive feeling. That’s another way to change your daily operating frequency.

So, tomorrow, take time to recognize those conditions in your life during those first few hours. Each is indicative of an alignment (or misalignment). Then, recognize the good resources you have and write them down. In a future article we’ll look at how that list can empower you and change your tune.

Anthony M. Davis, CCH, MSCA

Mr. Davis is a Certified Consulting Hypnotist, Leadership, Personal and Success Coach and an Accredited Stress Coach in Charlottesville, VA.

He helps clients that faced years of abuse or personal trauma. Using a series of Transformative Life Centering processes, he helps them realize their inner worth and regain their lives. His clients include everyday people with everyday problems, celebrities and business professionals who travel from all over the U.S. to see him. He prides himself with the reward of life change in his clients. For more information, visit Healing Hypnosis

Also posted in Calm, Stress

Sometimes the Unexpected is Good

Taking my Chalk and Going HomeA few years ago I was shooting photos early one Saturday morning. In the downtown area of Charlottesville, Virginia there is a chalk wall where people leave a variety of comments and drawings.

On that early September morning, I noticed that square in the center of the wall it said, “You will likely forget this ever happened”. Given the flurry of colors and words, pictures and printing, it was a good representation of how so many are caught up by the noise. It becomes likely that an experience is forgotten.

As I was framing the photo, a little girl walked through the image carrying a plastic bag. The image that I call, “Taking My Chalk and Going Home” was an unplanned treasure and she made it more than I intended it to be. Instead of a wall of text and drawings, it now has life and intention as this little girl seemed determined and focused on her direction.

Can you remember those days as a child full of dreams, hope and imagination? I recall imagining that I could build a spaceship and go to the moon.  At the time I was living in the Bayside Trailer Park…and it was nothing like a park: dirt roads with pot holes and old trailers and old cars.  Yet, that was the life we had during some very poor times. Even so, I could still imagine flying toward space and my only supplies were some scrap pieces of wood found behind an empty trailer.  Where did those days of wonder go?  If asked, some will answer that question by saying that life got in the way or the unexpected came their way.

It’s easy to get caught up with life and the busyness that comes with it. Some limit their dreams to what they currently have and falsely believe that is the limit of their potential. For those who believe that self-limiting story, that becomes their reality. Yet, it doesn’t have to be or stay that way.

When the unexpected comes, sometimes it brings opportunity. Opportunity to see things differently, to feel things differently, or even look at ourselves in a new way. Granted the photo is a “little” unexpected thing. There are the big things that come along that can shake us if we are not grounded and prepared to view it from different angles.

When you look at the cross section of a tree stump, its history is displayed by the age rings. The inner rings (or child years) are part of the same tree with the older rings. Notice how the inner rings are protected by the nicks and dings of life while the older rings are closer to the thin skin of the tree that shows the wear.

Our hopes, our dreams, our ambitions and our potential for the future are still there, just clouded by unfocused noise.

Don’t let the unexpected limit you, but use it as an opportunity. Ask yourself, “What lessons can I learn from this?” And, “What can I do with that?” If you want your life to move forward, you have to move.  Movement takes action. Just know that inside, you are the same capable person, able to imagine and create a future in the same way you as a child could do in your imagination.  If the noise of life or the unexpected has gotten in the way from what you currently believe is your future, that can be changed – you can live the life you’ve been wanting.

If you’re unsure where to go or what to do next, then seek the help of a Life Coach. You will see the empowerment that is already within you to find your way to success. I can help you get there.

~ Anthony M. Davis, CCH, MSCA

As a side note, this unexpected image sold many times over as art prints.

Also posted in Coping with Change

The Art of Completeness

spaSay the word completion slowly and out loud. Take time to form each syllable as if you were savoring a rich dessert. Notice how there is a slight uplifting of the corner of your mouth. A hint of a smile. There is a feeling of fullness and satisfaction on hearing the very sound—completeness.

To categorize completeness as an art is to embark upon a broader dimension of its’ meaning. True art is personal and transforming—both to the artist and to the recipient or viewer of the work.

There are many expressions of art. Typically, we associate art in the realm of paintings, sculptures, and musical compositions.

We are comfortable on established sanctions of what art is. True art; however, is limitless; it has no boundaries. Art lies deep within its creator. In that premise, a scuba diver, watchmaker, chess master, seamstress or speech writer is just as worthy of the title artist as Rembrandt or Mozart.

The process of a work of art—be it physical or mental in nature has a definite formula. This equation, if you will, is simply: From a defined starting point progress forward until you reach the finish. Once you start, don’t stop until you are done. This is the essence of completeness. It may sound simple, but that would be an error in understanding the complexity of what completeness entails.

The art of completeness is not a random, Helter Skelter, no decision making initiative. Quite the contrary, art in any form is thoughtful, deliberately executed work. In order to achieve the satisfaction of completeness, we have to have realistic comprehension of what the undertaking is going to require. There can be no shortcuts. We must be up to the task and have whatever resources are necessary to accomplish our goals.

Your entirety as an individual, specifically, your energy, passions, endurance, skills, mindset and precision are governed in three distinct arenas:

  1. The Desire.
  2. The Doing.
  3. The Continuing.

A strong desire is a must for without it, nothing will ever be finished or complete.

Excuses, such as I have no time, it’s not the right time. Or its’ just too late now will creep in and smother whatever dream you hope to fulfill. The truth is that complacency will rush in to engulf a person to find reasons not to start anything. In this mental state, it is easy to be fearful and reluctant to take any perceived risks.

However, if you are blessed with a pursuing, strong desire as your motivation, you can move forward into the doing phase. Here is where desire comes alive. This is a work zone. Whenever you see a building going up, there is usually a finished rendering to allow you to see what the end result will be. Day by day as you pass the work site, you see and hear the forming of that picture taking shape. It is often a lengthy process.

Sometimes, there are setbacks and the work halts for a short while, then starts up again until one day, there is a magnificent building towering skyward. The workmen behind this building often looked at the concept drawing. They drew energy from seeing it, but that was not enough to produce the building. They had to show up for work and be prepared to do whatever the day called for, and the next day, etc. They were not working for short term goals—a months’ pay–they were creating a dream which started on a piece of paper. The doing took a sustained effort to reach completion, but what a sense of accomplishment to step back and look at what their hands rendered.

Thankfully, there are many individuals who posses whatever is needed to successfully maneuver beyond the doing phase. We appreciate their art in all of its forms. As a global community we share the products of others completed dreams. We benefit from hours of research to produce formulas for drugs which can enhance the quality of life, we are delighted and entertained by enriching musical performances and are in awe of the scope of the universe through the pictures returned from outer space. All of these gifts are ours to enjoy because someone had the desire, the doing, and the continuing.

Here lies the final and sweetest phase. If one painted one picture, or wrote one song, or built one airplane, we would never be where we are now. The continuing means going on to the next work. We take what we know and make it better. We keep creating until it is time for another to take our place. That is the cycle of life—a full life. A life of completeness. Now, that is an art.

~ Gale Davis

Also posted in Calm, Completenes